What feelings and emotions do you see in this picture?
I probably look happy, confident, full of joy, and enjoying a photoshoot. In fact, this picture was taken during one of the toughest periods of my life.
* Someone has just tricked my mother financially using me. ⠀⠀
* I did not feel beautiful due to acne which was well covered for this photoshoot.
* It was just 1 month after giving birth, and motherhood felt so new. ⠀⠀
* I just turned 20, studied at university and paused my part time job. ⠀⠀
* I heard gossips & judgment about me. Although I seemed not to care, I felt hurt.⠀
* By then, I have not yet been to any vacations abroad, didn´t have a bicycle, been by the sea only once. I spent my summers reading, dreaming, or with friends in nature.
Our experiences are invisible in pictures.
But now when I look at this one I remember very clearly that I did not act to look happy. I did feel happy! And thankful, because:
* It was my dream to have a family of my own early – and I had it. ⠀⠀
* I loved to study – so I did it. ⠀⠀
* I had less time to build my career – but that brought more focus for taking clear actions towards a career I wanted.
* I wanted to be independent, to travel and see the world – so I worked for it.
* I trusted someone and was tricked – but learned to be careful with money.
* I wanted to love myself more – so I listened to signals of my body and changed the lifestyle which was affecting my health. ⠀
* I turned away from people who judged me instead of lifting me up – and I had less but stronger people around me. I became surrounded by people who loved and supported me.
What happens to us is often here to help us grow. There are moments we want to give up our dreams due to the things stopping us from going forward. What if we then shift our mindset and focus instead on the smallest opportunities we have? And implement actions, at our own pace?
My story is an example that it is then that the simple down to earth magic happens. And I dare to share it here only because I know there are people out there who have been through something similar and need encouragement to move on.